Dazed and Confused

It's been a little over a month since we got engaged and 'Distracted' doesn't even begin to describe what I'm dealing with here.

Moving, changing jobs, and getting married are usually seen as the big life changes that can cause an unusual amount of stress for a person. And I'm contemplating all three at once, so I've been a little tense lately.

First, moving... I've been living in the same apartment for almost 3 years now and I've been mostly satisfied. It's conveniently located, has a pool and is within my budget, which is important. And I've known for a while now that my lease is about to expire at the end of May. So, what to do? Do I move into another apartment or stay where I am? The main problem here is that just about every place I've checked into requires a 12-month lease, including where I live now. If I'm thinking about moving to California within the next 12 months, which will happen one way or the other, I probably don't want to sign a 12-month lease, right? Long story short, I decided to alleviate some of the stress for myself and stay. I did have to sign another lease, but I have to option of subletting. Of course, I'm still looking at packing up most of my things in preparation for the future move to California. May as well stay ahead of the game, right?

Changing jobs, on the other hand causes more stress and worry for me than any of the other things on my plate right now. I love my job and my company has been very good to me. Finding a new job holds so much insecurity and uncertainty for me, I almost start hyperventilating just thinking about it! So, I'm going to do channel my inner Scarlett O'Hara and 'Think about that tomorrow.'

Getting married is yet another huge change for me. I'm not at all stressed or worried about the actual act of being married. Pete and I are soul mates and we'll be together until death parts us, or until one of us kills the other. Just kidding, Mom :). So, no worries about that. But Marriage and a Wedding usually come together, but are two totally separate things! So the questions now racing through my mind include, but aren't limited to: Do we have a nice family wedding? Destination wedding? Go to Vegas? When? Who will officiate? What colors do I want? How much will the reception cost? Band or DJ? Holy Crap, how'd I gain 20 pounds? How do I lose 20 pounds? You know, the normal stuff.

Calgon, Take Me Away!!!!

Nope, I'm not crazy yet. Of course, some of you may debate that :). But I am making lots of lists. Lists for everything, to try to keep organized. Lists for the actions I can take, rather than hovering over the things I can't do anything about just yet. That seems to help. Being Pro-Active. And I don't mean the skincare regimen, ladies!

I've started getting packing supplies so that I can pack what I don't use very often. I've casually started looking into wedding options. Dresses, color schemes, locations, etc. Just to be prepared. Remember, my fiance likes to do things last minute, so I may finally be able to pin him down on a date of 1/1/11, on 12/1/10. I actually talked with him about all of these worries and my first question was 'Ok are you ready to talk about setting a date?' Pete's response, 'Um no, but I would like to enjoy being happily engaged for a little while.'

The first item on my agenda of things I can control:

Stop being a lazy bi-otch!

I have GOT to get off my ever-widening arse and do something to get some poundage off. I know how to do it, it's just a matter of doing it. And, of course, I'm typing this after eating pasta with italian sausage and a donut for breakfast. But I digress. It starts today! I will be exercising 30 minutes every morning and 30-60 minutes every evening. I will cut back on my carbs, cut out fried food altogether, and I will drink more wine :). You know, wine is good for the heart!

While I'm feeling a little Dazed and Confused now, I'm excited about what the next 6 months may hold for me. Stay tuned for more!